I get similar responses 9 times out of 10 SamuelMcMalley

That's always a contentious issue anywhere there is multi-way combat/resource extraction. As a social network, it seems like normal etiquette should apply; however, the programmers really can't assume that everyone will share a common definition of "normal etiquette," so they try to balance the game as though people will just walk up and join in at any time (this game is also particularly keen creating the perception that it's always the more is the merrier).

when u log on , log to a quiet server good chance there wont be many people ther

Unfortunately the quiet ones are the ones frequently inhabited.