[Jane_Omalley]

I get asked the question by a player at least once every time I log into play, "Why did you leave the Widow Makers guild that you started?"

Here is the background and here is why I left the guild (yes, the one I started).

1) I started the guild really on a whim with my friend Johnny. I actually didn't care about building a "leaderboard" guild; I really just wanted to have fun. I naturally want to help other people learn and grow in the game. I built friendships with a lot of people who ultimately joined our guild. I made them officers. I trusted them. From November, 2007 to the beginning of February, the guild was great. Everyone was helping each other, the higher level players waiting for the Boss Quest were more than happy to help the lower level players complete their quests. The game was FUN - and the guild ended up growing... to about 200. I didn't do much of the recruiting, except in the beginning with some really key players to build the foundation of our guild. Officers then recruited and got other members to join. This is when problems started to occur.

2) Some officers didn't get along with other officers. Some felt players were being annoying and talked too much about themselves in the guild chat. Others were tired of the younger players chatting away about nothing in the Guild Chat. Some officers felt that other officers were bossy, mean, or were trying to "take over the guild". I know that these are all issues that will occur when you've got 200 diverse members in your guild. I mean, of course there are times that I get annoyed with other players, but I usually just ignore it or if it really bothers me or is inappropriate, and then I will talk to the person directly. That usually solves the issue. I also don't have as much time to play as other guild members - so I may play about 2 - 3 hours each night. Others can play all day. Common sense says - the ones that play all day are the most in tune to what is happening within the guild. However, the times I logged in, sometimes someone would say to me "ugh, this person is driving me crazy", but never was an issue brought to my attention where the Officer or member said: "Jane - I have X problem. This is a BIG problem and if it is not fixed, I'm thinking of leaving the Widow Makers." All officers knew they could private message me here on the forums, or at least post to the threads here. So, I was accessible, even when I wasn't playing.

So, one day in early February, I logged into the game, and all I can say about that day is --- I was crushed. My friends -- my original Officers I recruited or other players I came to trust, laugh and have fun with -- left the Widow Makers. I found out almost immediately after logging in, when I was bombarded with whispers that "Angel left the guild and started her own with another pirate, and she took a bunch of people - good people - with her". I teleported to a friend I was sure would never leave the Widow Makers and saw "The Elite Circle" above the head of that player - and about four to five others of my friends and former guild members. I felt shocked, betrayed, and disappointed. I felt like all I tried to build - the collaboration and friendships were just.... gone.... it was awful. I didn't understand why not ONE of my friends, that I played so much with, would just leave the Widow Makers without talking to me first -- without explaining or seeing if we could fix the issues that were occurring within the guild first.

3) I was told by these other players that it was nothing personal. Then they told me all the reasons why they left (which I stated above). Others members of the Widow Makers told me that Angel was still in our guild, but that she would log off and say in Guild Chat, "I'm logging off now and logging in as Hunter with my new guild". So... more and more followed each day. I was upset, angry, and felt completely out of control of the situation. I removed Angel from the Widow Makers - and I hated doing it, but some actions needed to be taken ASAP - to stop this mass exodus of members.

4) Another officer removed one of the kids within the guild - one that players would say was annoying. But, she was just a kid and when I tried to talk to her to explain, and give her another chance to come back in the guild, it was too late - her feelings had been deeply hurt - she didn't want to come back, and said to tell everyone how sorry she was for whatever she did. She was only 10. And again, I felt awful. Apparently, she was a big part of why some members left the guild. However, how many actually talked to her and said - "hey, when you do this, it is annoying to people"? I don't think anyone ever did.

5) Then I found out that my closest friend in the guild, who I played with so much, and talked to like one of my girlfriends, and trusted, and really adored her -- that she was not really a "she" - but a man playing as a woman pirate. THIS completely shocked me. When I approached "her", she admitted it. Again - I felt shocked and somewhat betrayed. How could I be playing with this person for so long and they never told me they were really a man?

6) Every time after that when I logged into the game, I was hardly ever able to actually play. I was just bombarded with whispers from Widow Makers: "XYZ left and went to Angel's guild", "X person is really annoying me", "Y person teleported to this other player without asking and then 5 people followed, and they ended up taking over this other person's ship, and that person got upset and logged off". Or, "I heard this... is it true?", or "This officer recruited this player who has no etiquette and they're too young or low level to understand that I'm trying to fight a stump and I can't have them teleporting to me and then it decreases my points or I get hurt by the stump". I could go on forever. I am not the type of person to just ignore other people, so it just became chat, after chat, after chat. Me trying to solve the issues, me telling the person how to solve the issue they brought to me, etc. And it was NOT fun for me. It was not even like a game anymore.

7) As more female players learned that the "she" pirate was really a "he", they got upset and left the guild. I decided to give this player the benefit of the doubt, remain his/her friend, and fellow Guild Leader. We had spent so much time together, and he/she was responsible for recruiting so many of the great (now former) Widow Makers. But now I knew, and so, the game goes on.

8) Number 8? I know, it just goes on and on, right? I was logging on for about a week and playing and never saw my best friend from the game and guild - Johnny. I wanted to talk to him and get his input into all of this. We had started the guild, after all -- we had been playing together since we were kids (at least that's how it feels - our pirates grew up together). I checked with other players to see if he'd been online lately - they said they'd seen him, but it seemed like I was always just missing him. Finally, last week, he and I were on at the same time. I teleported to him to see: "The Elite Circle" above his head.

It was at this point when I realized that I was taking this game way too personal. I was steaming mad at Johnny. I announced in the guild chat that I was leaving the Widow Makers. Officers (any that were remaining) teleported to me, and some tried to talk me out of it. I decided to learn from my lessons and start over - build a guild with strong, but friendly and helpful players - with a max of 15 total players. I was so tired of the complaining, the constant whispers saying "we need to talk", and the endless chats that arose. I was tired of feeling betrayed and shocked and my faith and trust in those I formed friendships with plummeted.

I left the Widow Makers and started another guild. While angry and upset, with feelings of resentment and bordering on wanting revenge (not sure to who, really) - I went through the motions of forming another guild. When it was time to request the name for the guild, I chose "Blood Will Spill". It felt appropriate and fitting and right.

I was pretty angry with Johnny, but he apologized and said he wanted to be with me in the new guild. Kat Chainbellows also stuck by me and she is part of our trio now. She is awesome. The "he" playing a female pirate told me I was a quitter and had no backbone. He said "I guess this is goodbye" and dropped me from his/her friends list. I found that very ironic.

I am still friends with those in "The Elite Circle", and we will chat and help each other out. It is a really unfortunate ending to the Widow Makers, but one that seemed destined after all of these turn of events. The Widow Makers still exist; they just don't have a Guildmaster. Some players have asked and some have begged that I go back to the Widow Makers. Others want to be in my new guild and want to leave the Widow Makers. And alas, the drama I wanted to leave is still lingering. Sigh.

Those reading this may or may not agree with my decision. That's ok. It was what I felt I needed to do. I think it may be the one selfish thing I've ever done in the game. But I'm ok with that. Especially because I play the game as ME - I don't have an alter ego who turns into Jane O'Malley when I log into play. And I *assumed* - which was the WRONG thing to do - that others were like me. That was a valuable lesson I learned from the first online, truly interactive, online multi-player game I've played. The other lesson was about how to manage a guild correctly. The third was - I can't take this stuff so personally. And the fourth - I do believe that having so many high level players, without quests to do because the "Boss Quest" has been down for MONTHS, is part of the problem. When you have quests, you focus on them and work on them with others. It's fun. Without quests, it opens the door for drama like this to just walk in.

I have no ill will towards anyone in the game. I am fair and always will be to those I play with. I am still friends with everyone - really just wanted to share the (long) story.... and history of the Widow Makers.

We shall see what happens next. If you made it this far reading my story - thank you, I know it's a long one.


Jane O'Malley