Total Pwnage
"Dat ship is a piece of junk!" George exclaimed, pointing at The Harkaway. "It iz all rotten n stuffz."
"Quit insulting her!" Britney screamed. "Its the ship of JOLLY ROGER! HE'LL KILL US ALL!"
"I wantz a Jolly Rancher!" George said excitedly, licking his lips.
"DAMN IT YOU IDIOT!" Anton said, punching George and knocking him to the floor of The Barnacle Brig. "FLEE! FLEE! SAIL FOR OUR LIVES! WE CAN'T TAKE ON JOLLY ROGER!"
"Ready teh gunz!" George ordered.
"At least I'll be put out of my misery..." Britney muttered, walking to a cannon.
The crew reluctantly went to the cannons. After all, they couldn't outrun The Harkaway. She was too fast. The two ships closed in on each other. George was really excited. He was about to sink Jolly Rancher! He would be a legend forever. The crew of The Barnacle Brig was terrified, but they knew that running would just end in their demise. Closer and closer, the two ships got. And soon...
"FIRE TEHH BOREDSIDES!" George yelled. The three pathetic cannons of The Brig fired, and the cannonballs flew toward The Harkaway at less than a good speed (what else do you expect from this floating pile of poop?). George watched excitedly as the Cannonballs flew right at the enemy ship. They hit! And then they bounced off the hull without leaving a dent.
There was complete silence aboard The Barnacle Brig for a moment as they looked at The Harkaway floating before them, undamaged by the broadside. George's mouth was open so wide that you could probably stuff a watermelon inside of it.
"Uhh..." Anton muttered.
"AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Britney screamed at the top of his lungs. He ran around the deck, screaming and tripping and knocking things over. He eventually ran into the mast and slammed his head, falling to the floor. After a few seconds, he got up and started screaming again, before jumping into the water and swimming as far away from the two ships as he could.
The crew of The Brig stared at the figure of Britney swimming away in the darkness and fog, until they heard the sound of cannons being loaded. They turned in fear towards The Harkaway. The broadside cannons now were poking out of the side of her hull, aimed directly at The Barnacle Brig. Brandy and Banana gave each other a quick glance, and in a second they were following Britney. Anton started flying after them. But of course, George stayed behind.
"Oh crudzerz..." George muttered, before the guns fired directly at The Brig.
George shut his eyes, screamed and covered his heads as the cannonballs landed on the hull of The Brig. Wood flew everywhere, the mast toppled over into the sea, and gunpowder barrels beneath George exploded, blowing the ship into hundreds of pieces, and sending George flying up about thirty feet in the air. George opened his eyes and looked down, to see a mess of planks and broken ship parts in the place where his not-so-majestic ship once was. He then realized that he was thirty feet in the air.
"Ahh! I hatez tehh heights!" George screamed. He tried to flap his arms and fly, but he was too fat, and he belly flopped into the sea. He floated up to the surface of the ocean, screaming in pain from the flop. After a few minutes of screaming, he weakly grabbed onto a floating piece of The Barnacle Brig and looked back at The Harkaway. He could see a little dingy coming from it towards him, filled with skeletons. That was the last thing he saw before going unconscious.
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George awoke on the floor, weak and in pain. The floor beneath him was made of moldy and rotten planks, as were the walls and ceiling. Around him were rusted up bars, enclosing him in a jail cell. Even with his noobish mind, he was able to figure that he was on The Harkaway. He weakly sat up, groaning from the pain. He noticed that his Lost Sword and other weapons were gone, taken by the skeletons that probably picked him up.
He looked around him, and saw that his friends had been picked up. Anton was trapped in a little bottle, sitting on a table. Britney was sitting in the corner of his cell, rocking back and forth, arms wrapped around his legs. Banana sat on a broken bench in her cell, with a defeated expression on her face. She saw George looking at her, and gave him a weak smile. Her clothes were tattered, and she had bloodshot eyes. George looked away to see Brandy laid sprawled out on the floor, with a bloody gash in his forehead. For once, he was without a bottle of some sort of drink. George took note of this. Probably too much note.
"BRANDY! YOU NEEDZ YOUR DRINK!
" he screamed. Everyone in the room immediately jumped up in shock from the loud noise, and the crew of The Brig stared at George. They heard the sound of a loud curse from outside.
"GEORGE YOU IDIOT!" Britney yelled. "WHY I OUTTA---"
Britney was silenced by the sound of a door opening. Everyone went silent and fearfully turned to the open door. A large skeleton walked in. He was wearing a large, captainy looking hat. On one of his hands was a strange device that looked like a combination between a sword and a pistol. One of his legs was something that looked like a donkey hoof.
"you!" George said, running up to the bars of his cage. "i demandeth to speak 2 your captin! teh living places here are icky, and you sunk meh ship! LET MEH TALK TO TEH CAPTAIN OR I WILL KILL YOU!"
The skeleton spat towards George and approached his cell. George scrambled back in fear, remembering how much he was afraid of skeletons.
The skeleton examined George before laughing so hard that it looked like he would cry. He soon ceased his laughing, and spoke.
"You want the captain, eh? Well foolish one, yer lookin' at him."
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There's your chapter mates!