The Victory Mermaid

[KeeperOfTheCode]

What a sorrow... for Constance. By the way, it may be minor, but you said, Her eyes filled up with tears, as 'the' always had.

It's a fair story, but by the time you've reached chapter ten, I hope you've added on to their characters. What I mean to say is, show us their personalities. By the end of this, we should be able to think, 'Well, since I know this about her, she'll probably react this way...'. Of course, that means that straying from the beaten path will surprise your readers all the more.